$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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