Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
