Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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