A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize