My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
