I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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