Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Sorry about my life...
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
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