quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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