Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
another moral hangover. fuck.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
