Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
