the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
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