I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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