Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
