we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
