Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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