Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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