you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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