just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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