What did we do last night that was yellow?
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize