I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
