Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
