I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
