Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
