It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
