where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
