oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
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