coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
