If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
