and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
