Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
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