This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Watching her eat just hurts me
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Randomize
