Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
