I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
