I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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