halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
