I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
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