guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Shame - the story of my life.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
