So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
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