We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
it hurts more in the daytime
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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