new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
