You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize