idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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