I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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