But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
look no pants
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize
