So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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