you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Randomize
