Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
