i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
