Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
