Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
