I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Do you still have your period?
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
